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Have you ever thought to yourself, “I can’t believe that person just said that.” or, “I wonder if that person knows how terrible that sounded.” At first glance at the title, “How to Win Friends & Influence People” may sound like a silly little book that you need not pick up. Nothing could be further from the truth. This book, by none other than Dale Carnegie, is one for your personal library. In fact, my wife and I often tease that we need to order these by the truckload and deliver them to anyone who has no social skills that we run into living our everyday lives. The Carnegie Institute reports that even if your chosen profession is as technical as engineering, only 15% of your financial success is due to ones technical knowledge, and the other 85% is due to skill in human nature - to personality and the ability to lead people.

It’s really a book about being the best person you can be so that people will feel comfortable in your presence. In a nutshell, it’s what to say to people in any situation and what to avoid saying to make the most out of life. Carnegie uses hundreds of real life examples and stories that are fun to read. He takes you back to actual events and news stories from the 1920’s all the way up till modern day that draw the reader in and offer insightful nuggets of advice.

The author skillfully narrates his words onto the pages of this masterpiece, covering such topics as 1.) fundamental techniques in handling people 2.) Six ways to make people like you 3.) How to win people to your way of thinking, and 4.) How to change people without giving offense or arousing resentment. Within these topics I learned things like criticizing, condemning or complaining never helped anyone. I learned to give honest and sincere appreciation. I learned that in order to get anyone to do anything, you have to arouse in the other person an eager want. Becoming genuinely interested in other people, smiling, remembering names, encouraging others to talk about themselves, becoming a good listener, and lastly, to make the other person feel important, and doing it sincerely would help me out. I’ve applied all of these to both my business and personal life and both have prospered big time.

To wrap up, this book is a must read. This time-tested advice has been in print now for over 50 years, and was updated in the 90’s so that we can relate to the stories. The copy I have, that was published in 1982, says on the front cover that 1,500,000 copies had been sold. Who knows in the 25 years since then how many more have benefited from this simple advice. Most of it is common sense, but is really never taught by anyone. Parents won’t know to teach it to their kids unless they have read it. Teachers and schools unfortunately don’t have this “real-life” info in their curriculum. Why not, who knows. I think it should be required reading for every adult. The world would be a much happier, friendly, and prosperous place!

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